So, I usually use this blog to write about our crazy lives with lots of kids and residency schedules mixed in with full time work. Today, I feel like the least I can do is talk about recent events that have been happening. I challenge you to read on. With an open mind. Judge me, but wait until the end before doing so. Try to put yourself in others shoes.
Most everyone has heard about what happened to Ahmaud Arbery. He was the 25 year old black man who was murdered while JOGGING. You know one of the few activities we can still do during a pandemic because you can social distance while doing so. Here’s the deal, hubs goes for runs when he’s able. That could have been him. It’s no different, it really isn’t. I mean, he’s older, sure, but he’s a black man. That alone was the grounds they used when they called 9-1-1. “There’s a black male running down the street.”. You can hear the caller say that 15 seconds into the call. That could have been hubs. That could have been one of my sons. What about him being black makes it illegal or threatening? And, IN WHAT WORLD is it okay for a citizen to take matters into their own hands? You call the police and let them handle it. I mean, if someone drives up on me with a gun, I’m running too. If they attempt to fight me, you can believe I’m going to fight back. Especially if I’m out minding my own business. I’m just sayin’.
Here is where it hit home even more. I have anxiety. I have for years. It’s managed, but sure, during this time of pandemic and kids in the house non-stop, it’s worse than normal. I grew up never thinking twice that my dad would make it home fine or that my brother, in all of his shenanigans, would be okay. We shrugged off getting pulled over. It wasn’t a big deal. I woke up earlier this week and hubs was gone. I figured he went running, that’s not unusual for him to do if we’re all still sleeping and he has the day off. All that I could think of is that he was being hunted down by some lunatic who felt they were keeping the area “safe” because they saw a black man running. That is NOT fair.
We have to teach our boys how to talk to officers so that they do not become the next Philando Castile. They are not allowed to ever play with any kind of toy gun outside of our house because I cannot turn off and forget what happened to Tamir Rice. We have had to frequently talk to the boys about how to “behave in public” because we do not know if someone could feel “threatened” and take matters into their own hands like what happened to Trayvon Martin. I could go on and list dozens of other black men who were senselessly murdered because someone decided to fully embrace their racial bias.
It is not fair that wives and mothers have to worry that their family is at risk for doing activities many people take for granted in this country, the “land of the free and home of the brave”. Hubs fought for this country and loves this country, we both do. That is not full freedom if you cannot be outside without worrying that you may be targeted.
If you can change the channel and not think about what’s happening, that is called privilege. It’s a cushy place to be, there are never uncomfortable conversations you have to have with your family. You have the privilege of not having to worry about your family being hurt or killed because it doesn’t impact you directly. This is not to say that “All Lives Matter” is untrue. We’re all part of one human race, of course everyone matters. It’s not only Black Lives Matter. I am saying that for centuries black people were oppressed and treated in a subservient manner. It’s been that way for so long that people justify sickening behavior. For so long WE HAVE GONE ALONG WITH IT. We haven’t challenged it and and asked what if it was my son or husband on that tape getting shot by those two men? Wouldn’t that have been murder in broad daylight? Of course it is! We hear the popular comments, “oh, he must have been doing something” or “if he would have just listened”. Why is it okay for those men who shot Ahmaud to demand he comply? Because they’re white and he’s black? What if it were black men doing that to a white man? Or white men demanding a white man comply? What’s different about those other examples is that the dialog always gives the benefit of the doubt to the victim. In Ahmaud’s case, the benefit of the doubt is given to the murderers.
My opinions may be unpopular or not considered factual to everyone. Your opinion is your own, as is mine. But I can assure you, based on my family experiences, this is our reality. This is what we live. Every day. Pandemic or no pandemic. We have the opportunity to change the narrative so the next generation can focus on working together and being the best they could ever imagine. Doing great things for humanity. Please, think of those around you and be brave in standing up against traditions and false information. Instead of continuing the cycle of hate, bigotry, and denial.
Working Mommy Memoirs 