Many of you may wonder what it is like to be living through med school, what is “normal” for the day-to-day stuff. Well, it varies. Most of the time our lives are crazy, on the go non-stop making sure the boys are where they need to be, when they need to be. Then, if we’re lucky, able to catch some time later in the evening together. There will be many blog posts about this I’m sure, so today, I will focus on one particular item that is a sign that you may be living with a med student. Playing doctor. Now, get your head out of the gutter people, I’m not talking about that kind of playing doctor. I’m talking about when hubs has a practical that requires him to conduct an interview, examine a patient and show the people that matter he can actually be a doctor. This requires a LOT of practice. You may not know it just by going in for a checkup, but the “list” of things to do and check is LONG! Like 8 pages of meticulous items to walk through and remember. I don’t know about you, but I can barely remember my computer password for work so I totally understand the need to practice, a lot.
As you can imagine, this means that the people closest to the med student will be the test subjects. So, of course with 3 sick kids in the last 2 weeks, hubs has had a lot of practice. Also, with kids, you have to move fast because they have the attention span of a fruit fly so you need to focus on the main items of concern. I have had the privilege of helping hubs out too. Now, when I’m the test subject, I get to help him walk through the WHOLE list. We’re talking like 1-2 hours of stuff. Maybe not that long but sometimes it feels that way (no offense hubs). I try my hardest to be patient-like so he can get the full effect, but it’s not always easy. Especially late at night when I’m tired and sometimes goofy….like last night. Here are a few sample dialogs that may or may not have taken place. Don’t judge me, it was late, I was tired and hubs was being a great “doctor”….
Hubs: “Hello ma’am, what brings you in today?”
Me: “Just a checkup.”
Hubs: “Great, let’s get started.”
Me: “Okay, but don’t get any ideas…I’m a married woman and my husband’s a big fancy doctor.”
Hubs: “Um…..okay..?” (Smiles)
Procedure: Checking the nose with an otoscope
Hubs: “Okay, I need to look in your nose.”
Me: “I’m a little weird about you looking at my boogers.”
Hubs: “Really…?” (He looks in my nose).
Me: “Was it bad?” (Slightly mortified).
Hub: “Nope, you’re good.”
Me: “Wow, that’s a whole new level of closeness and intimacy I never thought I would encounter….”
Procedure: Checking inside the mouth
Hubs: “Now I need to check in your mouth.”
Me: Opens mouth, says ahh.
Hubs: “Looks good.”
Me: “Did you see what was stolen from me? They’ve been missing since I was 8.”
Hubs: Confused look.
Me: “My tonsils. The aliens took my tonsils when I was 8. They replaced it with sensitive teeth.” I was really tired at that point. Clearly.
Hubs: That look he gives when he realizes that we might have to call it a night and finish tomorrow.
Procedure: Neck motion
Hubs: “Now we need to check the motion of your neck. Can you tip your head from side to side?”
Me: “Is this a cruel blonde joke?” Hubs didn’t get it…he’s not blonde so he hasn’t ever had the jokes about bimbos shaking their heads back and forth like airheads. I’m not sure I totally get it but maybe that’s part of why it’s a blonde joke?
Procedure: Listening to the stomach
Hubs: “Now I will listen to your stomach and digestion.”
Me: “Okay.” I’m kind of secretly laughing at this point because I had a bit of a rumble tummy so I knew he would hear something good.
Me: My stomach rumbles really loud….I heard it plain as day on the outside and he was using a stethoscope. I start laughing really loud.
Hubs: Laughing at this point and unable to keep the stethoscope on my stomach because it was bouncy right off of my belly fat….which made me laugh harder….
Clearly at this point it was time to call it a night.
There is a whole new level of intimacy that we’re getting comfortable with that we hadn’t had before. Some is weird (the nose thing), some funny (stomach) and others are just part of the procedure. All in all, these are things that I know will help hubs become a great doctor and it allows me to spend time with him when most nights he would have his nose buried in a book. And, it’s a sure sign that you live with a med student.